My Secret Garden

I just finished painting the fences. It was one of those projects that I kept putting off to care for all the houseguests that I, in devotional love, let overstay. It is purposefully in the back. Hidden from view.

You see, this is my secret garden. My garden of love. Where I grow wildflowers and the rarest orchids, side by side, enhancing each other in their stark legacies of status. Wild animals can stray in as they, please. My dog is allowed. My lover, relatives, and friends are not. Never. No exception.

It’s unruly and kept. The ones who have seen my pubes, if allowed in, would recognize the ‘la natural’ inspiration in the landscape as well as from my long goddess locks. Maybe it’s more pubic or more lustrous than I am letting on. You will never know. That makes me giggle so hard.

In this secret garden, I work on my heart’s soul and my soul’s heart. This precious and lonely labor keeps my pulse dancing. After bending my back such, I strengthen and lengthen the spine of who I am. Building the muscle of loving others without needing them. You see, if I tell you I love you, you will never have to say it back. I shoveled so deep to place the roots of my garden that I don’t need love to be a transaction in words, roles, relationships anymore. Or even be a transaction at all. This garden feeds me well. I am finding myself now both fully satiated by love and ravenously hungry for more. So, Source/God likes to live here full-time. We both strip off our clothes and dance to rap, Bollywood, pop music, sometimes. We are eclectic in our musical and eh..other preferences. The neighbors have learned to love our uproarious laughter and revelry, even when in the middle of the night.

This garden teaches me to owe it a chance to grow, and in letting love wildin and spread untamed. I am learning to send flowers and fruit baskets to those whose hearts call my name. If you received one, be sure that your soul left me your address.

And in case you have also grown a secret garden, pray just tell me how do you pretend to be normal when going about your day?

______

This piece has emerged from my contemplation of ‘What is love’ and ‘Let love Transform’.

Inspirations: Khalil Gibran, Ester Perel, Simone de Beauvoir

This piece also has a tantric interpretation for me. My most sacred source of the warmth of unconditional love is within. The only flow of love is from the divine to me and from me to others. This is true for all those who allow it to be so.

Photo by Tim Cooper on Unsplash